Mindfulness and options

Mindfulness has found its way into the work of many cognitive-behavioral therapists, and for good reason. Any practice that has the potential to increase awareness, improve focus and reduce harmful judging deserves our consideration.

Someone practicing mindfulness is noticing their inner experiences (thoughts, feelings, urges and body sensations, for example), without necessarily acting upon them. The practice is designed to enrich whatever one chooses to focus upon, by allowing them to fully participate.

In my last post I wrote about how black-and-white thinking occurs when someone is limited in their ability to see good options for themselves. In her book, Mindfulness, Ellen J. Langer describes how the practice of mindfulness can serve as an antidote to this type of thinking. She writes:

A model of mindful receptivity is the inertial navigation system in modern aircraft. This device is constantly receiving new information, constantly letting the pilot know where the plane is at any particular moment. We have a similar mechanism operating within us as we walk or balance ourselves in other ways. Our minds, however, have a tendency to block out small, inconsistent signals (p. 67).

The inconsistent signals Langer mentions can be any bit of information or alternative point of view that we don't normally consider. Many times, we limit our own options by the way we think, which means only considering the options that come to us readily. Being mindfully aware of all information available allows us to see possibilities that we'd either dismissed or never considered. As Langer points out, the results can be liberating.

Thinking in black and white

An important part of any therapy is helping people make sense of things. As a therapist, if I can help someone figure out what’s really driving their emotions and behaviors, then there’s a chance they can do something about it.

One of the ways that CBT makes sense of things is by helping people identify the thoughts behind their moods. Once you pinpoint the thoughts, then you can start to examine them for accuracy.

I’ve found that many of my clients benefit from a list of thought categories that drive moods. These lists have various names—cognitive distortions, irrational beliefs, thinking errors—none of which I particularly like because of their pejorative nature. They’re simply ways of thinking that everyone engages in from time to time. The important thing is to recognize when your thoughts fit into one of the categories.

In this post, I’d like to look at one of the most common thought categories: black-and-white thinking (a.k.a. all-or-nothing thinking or dichotomous thinking). This happens when you see yourself as having very limited options in a situation, and none of them is good. Further, the options often represent opposite extremes (hence the “all-or-nothing”).

Some examples:

“I’m either a complete success or a total failure.”
“I can either stay in my job forever or quit right now.”
“If I don’t bottle up my anger, then I explode.”

When feelings are running high, it’s easy to lose sight of your options. Depression and anger can narrow your view even further. The CBT way of addressing these kinds of thoughts is to challenge them by asking, “Are these really the only options?” “Is there some middle ground or alternative that I haven’t considered?” Often it’s helpful to see your options as a continuum, with extremes at either end. This can help highlight the possibility that other choices exist somewhere in between.